Boyle May Have Negotiated Cork Sovereignty

18th Jun 2007

Boyle May Have Negotiated Cork Sovereignty
Danny Elbow

Despite being booted out of his D·il seat by Douglas Weekly star Deirdre Clune, Green Party chief negotiator Dan Boyle has made history by talking his party into government for the first time since their inception twenty five years ago.

It Boyle's down to Cork

While some Corkonians might be proud of that fact alone, it is of more importance to note that the PROC forum member's pivotal position in the negotiations allowed for a frank discussion about the People's Republic of Cork with the so called "Republican Party", Fianna F·il headed by Irish premier Bertie Ahern.

Last week's intensive negotiations dragged on far longer than expected and while Irish media outlets speculated that Mary Harney's health reforms and auctioning of public lands were the root cause of the delays, we can reveal that the real issue on the table was most likely Cork sovereignty.

In a surprise move by Bertie Ahern which also upset discussions on the next government, Martin Cullen was not moved to the back benches despite wanton waste of tax payers money in his last outing as transport minister.

The Mr. Bean of politics was instead moved to Social and Family Affairs where it is speculated his reputation will cause the end of the family unit and widespread social breakdown particularly in his own constituency of Waterford where this is already rife.

Over the next five years we should expect to see a slow but visible softening in the Irish Government's attitude to many things such as corporate donations and environmental issues but most importantly for Corkonians we will see an obvious thaw among Irish ministers in their support for the separation of the two states.

Perhaps violence won't be necessary overall.