Dunmanway Town V Liverpool

30th Jun 2009

Dunmanway Town Vs Liverpool
August 6th in Dunmanway

Dunmanway have, according to the national media, landed a coup in attracting Liverpool FC to Cork on August 6th. Yes, the real Liverpool we see on de telly are coming. To Dunmanway.

Dunmanway legend David Hall (left) in action against Clon earlier this year.

Most Corkonians aren't that surprised that one of the world's biggest eleven aside clubs are about visit Leeside - after all we are the best sporting county in the world and its not that long since they lined out against a League of Ireland side in 'Flower Lodge' - now Pairc Úi Rinn.

Clearly afraid to take on a Cork City FC side, The Reds are hedging their bets by taking on Dunmanway Town FC instead. Little do they know the cute-hoor trap they've fallen into.

The story is brilliant. Small and medium size clubs around the world are desperate to attract big name teams for pre-season friendlies. Bag a match against a super-club and your fundraising is done for the year (or in Dunmanway's case for the next decade).

Patronising reports condensed the Dunmanway coup into local player David Hall simply ringing up Anfield and plamásing the Liverpudlians into coming to West Cork. You can bet there was way more to it than that. These are West Cork men - decedents of those who out-thought the British Army 90 years ago.

Being a GAA stronghold they expected no more than 3,000. Sure t'was only Liverpool. So far they've had 26,000 phone enquiries and we all know what the reception can be like down there so there's probably another 26,000 who couldn't get through.

The Schquare below in Dunmanway.

Dunmanway is the birthplace of Sam Maguire - after whom the All-Ireland Senior football title is named thereby making Dunmanway the undisputed home of football - the fifteen man version that is.

The eleven aside game however currently dominates the globe. With gargantuan competitions like the FIFA World Cup, the Champions League, Copa América and the Murphy's Stout Linnane League Cup soccer dominates like no other and is arguably bigger than God (to be fair Christy Ring wasn't that well known in Brazil).

From TV coverage you might think that rugby is now a threat to this dominance but throw around an oval ball as you travel east of the Rhine River and you'll be in Japan before people stop thinking your football has been in an accident with a large truck. Soccer wins.

Himself.

Should Liverpool walk away defeated from the Rebel County this will herald a massive victory for Cork - and without wanting to exaggerate - over the entire world of sport. A proud stronghold of Gaelic games in Cork has offered to take on a sporting superpower at its own game. We love it.

Dunmanway Town have already (and brilliantly) started the mind games in a manner that is straight from the GAA bainisteoir handbook. Chapter one: talk up the opposition like its David and Goliath, your own team has no chance, you'll turn up but will probably be beaten out the gate and the most important thing is the honour of playing the opposition whom you hugely respect. Blah blah blah.

Chapter two: talk down your own side: club manager John Buckley has claimed they will need to draft in "a few" League of Ireland players to take on the British club. A statement that will surely register the match as a casual 'kick about' on the Liverpool pre-season training calendar.

Then came our favourite quote from a man who is quickly rising up the list of PROC's top Corkonians. Acknowledging Liverpool's popularity he initially estimated that about 3,000 Cork based fans would turn up. As one would expect Dunmanway FC's own pitch would not be suitable for such a bustling sea of sporting fans so he has set his sights on a new venue.

Dirk Kuyt. Could be in for a hiding in Dunmanway.

So one might assume the club would look for something significantly bigger than his own stomping ground. Croke Park? Turners Cross? St.Coleman's Park below in Cobh? Nah!

There's nothing more endearing than witnessing the spirit of parochial loyalty. Wait for it. The club are now hoping to locate the clash at….the Mary Immaculate College in Dunmanway. The local secondary school. Legends!

If all those over-paid poncy Liverpool players thought they were going to be treated like royalty at a UEFA approved stadium so they can 'maximise their performance' on the field they have another thing coming.

While the welcome in picturesque Dunmanway will be second to none and the local club will no doubt do their utmost to keep the pre-Madonnas happy you can be sure there'll be no bling. Just plenty of craic. This is not Old Trafford, Wembly or the Bernabéu. It's Cork and way more fun!

There's a sense of 'divilment' in all of us Corkonians imagening what it might be like for Liverpool when they arrive in Dunmanway on their bus (and they'd better leave early because the traffic can be brutal on a fine day).

The thought of these young multi-millionaires, used to obsessive-attention to detail in their pre-match routines, tripping over discarded geography books as they tog off in Dunmanway's secondary school is fantastic.

So is the image of Dirk Kuyt reading Dunmanway-related graffiti on a changing room toilet door or Ryan Babel's paranoia about the pile of little leather balls and large wooden sticks, some with blood on them, in the corner of the dressing room.

Joanne's in Dunmanway. Dont mind the architecture just try the roast.

There'll be no champagne, truffles or prawn sandwiches in Dunmanway - although we recommend the roast and mash in Joanne's Restaurant if you're sticking around. In fact, gouty food snobs hoping for some sort of exclusive corporate knees-up may be run out of the town for being so full of themselves if they dare to ask for such pampering. There's a table over there selling fizzy orange and taytos - cop on to yourself!

Dunmanway is set to make a killing from the tens of thousands of soccer fans that are set to besiege the town. B&B's and hotels that were struggling to survive are booking out fast. Restaurants, publicans and other local businesses will all get a major boost from the local soccer club's guile.

The Dublin government might have pulled us into a gloomy recession but Dunmanway has decided to roll up its sleeves, work its own way out of the mess and put itself on the sporting map. And don't think their plan stops there.

While everyone makes light of one of the world's biggest clubs taking on a little club in West Cork, you can be sure that the sports-mad Corkonians due to tog out for Dunmanway against the Reds are planning a tad more than a kick about. Watch out Liverpool.

Now, where can we buy a Dunmanway Town jersey?

It is expected that tickets will go on sale on Saturday July 11th, in Cork, Clonakilty, Dunmanway and Bantry.And yes, you may have to know someone who knows someone...