Majority of People in Skibbereen Will Have Won Rowing Medals by 2025

29th May 2017

A new plan compiled by authorities in Skibbereen and seen by the PROC Investigation Unit estimates that most young men and women in the town will hold medals from major national and international rowing events by 2025.

Furthermore in thirty years time it is projected that the number of people from the town who have achieved a podium finish at the highest level in the sport will exceed the total number of people living in the town. And in fifty years time there will be more medals in the town than there are rowers in the world.

That’s the kind of upbeat yet realistic attitude to sport that we at the People’s Republic love to see. Let’s not aim too high, like!

Take last Sunday morning for example - an ordinary non-championship Sunday. While most of us were still in bed Mark O’Donovan and Shane O’Driscoll were winning Gold at the European Rowing Championships in the Czech Republic with Gary O’Donovan, Paul O’Donovan and Denise Walsh bagging silver medals shortly afterwards. Nothing out of the ordinary if you’re from Skibb of course – even the post-match interviews that went viral were just regular around-the-town banter.  

The sensational Skibb victories coupled with Cork City’s 4-1 humiliation of Shamrock Rovers on Friday night rounded off a great weekend of sport on Leeside – as long as you don’t mention the near-miss at the Fraher Field in Waterford on Saturday that could have been the worst result for Cork sport in the history of sport – and that includes when Gougane barra unexpectedly lost to the Kilmichael Kidnappers in the Division 1 Wife Stealing League of 1548 A.D. (they beat them later on in the championship by just one wife but it was the start of a major decline for that great team).

If you have been distracted by the medal haul and the drubbing of Shams at the Cross then maybe it’s best you stay in your Cork bubble and all that needs to be said is that Cork footballers will be there to play Tipperary in the Munster semi-final next Sunday week. Just about.

Oar to be a…oar to be a….Rebel!